No, this isn't going to be a blog about sex. Seriously, get your mind out of the gutter folks! ;)
No, what I want to share with you now is about something more relevent to my life, dare I say it was a moment of revelation for me?
The first time I... went to a movie alone, I don't even remember which movie it was, but I felt like a loser. A pathetic loser without a date, without even a friend to accompany me. I remember I really, really wanted to see the movie, and didn't want to wait for a friend to be available to go with me. I remember walking in, feeling like all eyes were on me.
"Look at that girl alone... She must be one pathetic loser to go to the movies alone." (LIE! LIE!)
Since that fateful night in my life as a single woman, I have returned to the theater sans friends, sans boyfriend many times. I even saw Knocked Up alone, after work on a very chaotic Tuesday, and LAUGHED MY HEAD OFF. (Of course, later I saw it again with a friend, and was less impressed and a bit embarassed I had given it such rave reviews.)
But last Friday night, I found myself at home, alone, playing Scrabble on my laptop (preparing for a Scrabble Off with some people at church. really.) thinking of projects at work, people to call for church... and it hit me. What in the world, Cori! You are an amazing, creative, loveable woman. Get off your butt, and do something!
So, I went to a movie. Alone. Of course. And I saw the movie Sydney White (Amanda Bynes). I should have felt like the biggest weirdo in the entire world, sitting in a theater full of middle school girls (and some chaperones). Alone. I should have felt like a major dork ENJOYING a movie the middle schoolers around me were saying "how predictable, how lame.." when the really cute boy who played Prince Charming, kissed Sydney awake (like Snow White...). Okay so I did feel like a weirdo and a dork but I was giggling throughout the whole thing! Maybe I am just emotionally stunted? Hmm.
However, when I left the theater, passing cars lined up of parents waiting to pick up their children whom I just watched the movie with... I felt good. I felt light. I felt loved by God. I know its weird.
I went to Borders next and purchased two books. The first being a novel called, Desperate Pastor Wives, and the second called Women Who Do Too Much. Ironically, they should be companion books, as one helps solves problems faced by the characters in the other!
I have been a workaholic for the past several weeks. My name is Cori and I love my job and I can't stop doing it. Through all the busyness I have often been with loved ones, but I also have walked alone a lot as well. I have bounced from major project to weddings to bigger projects to taking on the world... and the Lord has sustained me through it all. But a lot of them time, I walk alone, with the mental knowledge I am not really... but with a physical reality contradicting.
But in all honesty, it did occur to me during the movie Friday night, and then again this morning when I was sitting at church with my two dearest girl friends and their husband and husband to be, with a BIG empty seat next to me... that I NEED A BOYFRIEND.
(Yes, a smart woman of God like myself did come to this sad, unshocking conclusion. I really don't understand why I don't (have a boyfriend). Maybe someone can help me out there?)
Hmm, maybe its unfair to want someone to save me on nights when the best thing I can think to do is watch a movie with a room full of thirteen year olds. Or play Scrabble on my laptop. Or read Women Who Do Too Much, with a very active highlighter. Not a Savior, I have One already.
Hmm.
Regardless, as I prepare to get ready for evening church where I will finish a project, attend a mission meeting, go to Uprising and worship with my friends... I find myself just me, just Cori.
And maybe thats okay?
Ugh.
(can you tell how I am vacillating on this!!)
all these pictures were taken at work... hmmm...
except the last one... i look like an evil conehead.
for my birthday, mel and chris perused my "things i want to do someday list" ... the end result: me taking a thai cooking class at the East Portland Community Center a week or so ago. I learned how to make delicious green curry! yum! It was a lot of fun, and was excited when another abundant lifer, Sarah G. was there to take the class with me!
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